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Friday, April 5, 2013

4/5/13

Fun sounds like the new Queen.
Lady Gaga sounds like the new Madonna.
Gotye sounds like the new Sting.

Last night I had a dream that there was a crippled Russian guy who killed Pinky the cat and then he wanted to date me.  I told him no cuz he killed my cat.  He swore he didn't do it but Nana said she swore she knew he did it.  No one actually saw him do it but there was substantial evidence.

A couple weeks ago Seann was telling me he never sees faces in his dreams.  At first I was like, "What? That's so weird." I kept going on and on about how weird I thought that was and analyzing it and trying to figure out psychologically why he wouldn't see faces in his dreams.  Then, the more I thought about it, the more I thought, "Wait. How often do I even see faces in my dreams? Maybe I don't see them either but I just never took mental note of the fact that I don't see them. Maybe it was never important enough for me to take mental note of because all I need to know is that I know who the people are that are in my dreams." It's so hard to remember if I even see faces or not. I feel like a lot of times I see them but only in peripheral vision so it's like they're blurry.

Another dream I had last night was that I was at some kind of place that was sort of like a museum and sort of like an aquarium or zoo. There was a baby whale in a tiny tank there and one of the workers there was talking to an audience all about that baby whale.  I asked one of the employees there, "That whale has a bigger tank to swim in when he doesn't have to do a presentation, right?"  The employee said, "No, but he's trained not to want to swim that far or that fast.  We take him out to get exercise often enough.  We have a harness/holster-type-thing attached to the side of a speedboat that he goes in and we take him out swimming that way.  We never go too fast or too far, so he's not used to that so he doesn't want to or need to. And our employees interacting with him, well, that provides all the socialization he needs. So, he's well taken care of." This made me very sad. I was there with my family, and strangely enough, it didn't make any of them sad.

Seann and I broke up.  He told me he doesn't love me but I guess I can't blame him.  I told him I was with him because I was past my mid-twenties and felt like I should've tried having a boyfriend by now.

Monday, April 1, 2013

from february


from february

Grape seed oil and vitamin e are antioxidants that defend skin from airborne pollutants

If I'm interpreting my notes correctly (that i wrote down after watching some kind of show on discovery science discovery health discovery history or whatever): a year before Neil Armstrong's trip into space, another journey took place that was more dangerous--a journey 30,000 feet into the deep sea. it was either jacues picard triese or don walsh.


sometime this year a live giant squid was first seen for the first time in human history i'm pretty sure.


the boys lost their first teeth sometime in these last few months.


i found out water is 1000 times heavier than air.

The other night, for the first time ever, when Seann was trying to ask me when I would be going over to his place, he said "when are you coming home?"

the 12th

It's like I'm turning over a new leaf in my life.

No, I probably shouldn't say that cuz that'll jinx it. It's what I'm 
trying to do though. I might have a new tattooing job. I quit trees. 
I'm going off my wellbutrin to save money.

So far so good.

the 20th

Ciara is an ophiucus if you go by the new astrology.  I don't like Elvis anymore, he stole music.  I went off my meds.  My dad bought his business. The boys turned seven.

the 26th

one of my drunken "epiphonies"

Every relationship in life has a purpose. A coworker's/boss's relationship with you is to show you how to make money with someone. A parent's/child's realationship with you is to show you how to take care of someone/be taken care of. A sibling's relationship with you is to show you how to be someone's friend and rival at the same time. No matter how much you may think the relationships in your life are just there to be there and be themselves, they're really there for a purpose; once that purpose is fulfilled, it's over with. ...I've come to this conclusion after being separated from one sister for four years and separated from another for eight.

Is it easier to raise animals because you never have to give them talks about life and how to live it? Or is it easier to raise people because they can tell you what's wrong and where it hurts?