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Monday, January 25, 2010
i finally figured it out
for the last couple days i've been so confused about what i want. it's like i want sex, like i'm horny, but i don't want it and i'm not horny at the same time. i mean i am, like i think about penises a lot, but when i try to imagine sex with any specific person it's not right. i crave sean's body. i imagine it. but then as soon as i imagine looking into his face then the fantasy is ruined. as soon as i look at his face i think, "that face will never love me." and then i'm not horny anymore. i'm just sad.
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